The saying goes that ‘Beauty is only skin deep’ But I believe the beauty in fact goes much deeper than that. ‘Hot’ is only skin deep. Beauty is a three dimensional concept. It has layers and pieces that aren’t automatically revealed just by looking at someone. To recognize beauty, you have to have an appreciation for something. To appreciate that thing, you first must have knowledge about it. When it comes to women, I think its fair to say that most guys’ knowledge could roughly fill up a post-it note. So I’ve decided to share some of my own observations in hopes of shedding some light on the elusive ‘beautiful woman’
Living with four female roommates this past year, I have gotten a rare glimpse into the lives of women. It’s a vantage point that few heterosexual males ever get to have. I’ve gotten to witness their practices and conventions. I’ve gotten a behind the scenes look at everything they do. What I’ve learned is that they are incredible. These four women encompass everything you would want your daughter to grow up to be. They are intelligent, compassionate, and loyal. They are independent and strong. They are in a word… beautiful.
Watching them get ready to go out:
It’s a ritualistic process that starts hours before leaving the house. Within the operation are a dozen mini tasks, each contributing to the final presentation. You have to watch them wield these tools with surgical precision and care. From curling, and straightening, to the tweezing and plucking, the process is repeated daily no matter the occasion. The clothes are chosen judiciously. Each item deliberately highlighting whatever the girl has chosen to be her weapon of attraction. Every accessory is carefully matched and balanced to acquire the perfect splash of color or contrast. Every piece has a purpose and a goal. The methodology is not one of vanity or narcissism. But rather a reflection or there own personalities displayed at eye level.
Entering a room with them:
Women enter a room with the grace and confidence of a 50’s movie star walking the red carpet. In this moment they are the center of all attention, and they carry it with complete control, never daunted by eyes fixated on them. Though insecurities may be hiding just under the surface, such trivial details are never revealed to the public. Instead they remain poised and steadfast… and can never be ignored.
Listening to a conversation:
It’s only when you really listen to a women’s conversations do you get a sense of the innate caring they all share. They listen rather than waiting for their turn to talk. They always look each other in the eyes. Women share a comradery that could only be likened to that of combat veterans. It is an unspoken bond they all share. A quiet understanding that they have faced the same demons and lost the same battles. And now exist as testaments to their strength having survived them. They share something that could never be expressed, but is rather accepted in a slight nod, to a sisterhood that spans the globe. They offer unwavering support for their friends and would admonish anyone who ever dreamed of hurting them. (usually us guys)
Watching them work:
A woman’s passion is always revealed through her professional life. And when you see it you suddenly realize that the fragile damsels we are taught to protect, are in fact incredibly intelligent and capable creatures that are in no need of our aid. They fight every day to prove these traits, sometimes for their entire adult lives. In their professional worlds they command attention through their knowledge as well as their complete control in every situation. They spend their lives on an un-level playing field, but never complain about it. Rather they push forward an inch everyday for the respect and consideration their male counterparts were given automatically.
Watching them prepare a gift:
Everything about the gift is well thought out. The time spent planning is an act in itself. Whether it’s for a husband or a friend, each aspect is assembled with care. Each piece is devoted to enhancing the recipient’s experience. It truly is the little things: how carefully it is wrapped, the meticulous application of the frosting, sincerity of the hand written note in every card. Every detail is an act of selflessness. From mothers on down, the most sincere gifts we ever receive come from the women in our lives.
While I’ve had the rare experience to view these things first hand, every guy has experienced the finished product. It’s often acknowledged, but rarely appreciated. The hollow compliments pale in comparison to the effort they exude. It would be like telling Michelangelo that the Sistine Chapel “looked nice”. But despite our shortage of adjectives, they continue to amaze us. As guys we often miss it. Too quick to assess what we see ‘skin deep’, never contemplating the tireless endeavors that have brought them there. We go on believing that these things are somehow all for us. That women need us much more than we want them. But upon closer inspection it is clear that as guys, we exist purely as accessories, only there to compliment or complete the overall package, and that these women are beautiful without us.
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